WHAT WE DO Woodhaven Counseling provides a wide range of services, dedicating our selves to our clients and their care.
- Psychological Evaluations for individuals of all ages
- Educational Evaluations for school placement and special services
- Alcohol and Substance Abuse for individuals of all ages
- Forensic Evaluations for legal proceedings
- Individual Adjustment
- Child Management
- Parent-Child Relations
- Marital Relations
- Alcohol and Substance Abuse
- Critical Incident Stress Management (CISM)
- Stress Management
- Parenting Skills
- Substance Abuse Education
- Professional Child Care Skills
- Topics tailored to your needs
- Treatment Planning
- Educational Planning
- Group Living
- Program Development
- Staff Development
- Clinical Supervision
WHO WE HELP We help people for a number of reasons. The following are just a few...
- Constantly fight with another family member
- Are often unhappy
- Have difficulty making decisions
- Need premarital counseling
- Want to enhance your marriage or partnership
- Are facing the stress of divorce, remarriage, death, etc.
- Are coping with a chronic or life-threatening illness
- Are coping with substance abuse or other addiction
- Have questions about mental health issues
- Refuses to behave
- Seems always to be in trouble
- Has temper tantrums
- Gets poor school grades for no clear reason
- Seems indifferent to life
- Is in trouble with the authorities
- May be using substances
- Needs effective treatment planning
- Desires basic or advanced skill development for professional and support staff
- Wants to enhance group child care
- Needs employment or promotion screening services
M.S., LIMHP, LMFT Licensed Independent Mental Health Practitioner & Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist
MS, NCC, LMHP Licensed Independent Mental Health Practitioner
Nicholas J. Battafarano
M.D. Child and Adolescent Psychiatry and General Adult Psychiatry
LuAnne M. Even
Psy.D. Clinical Psychologist
LIMHP, CMFT, MBA Licensed Independent Mental Health Practitioner & Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist
Psy.D. Licensed Clinical Psychologist
LIMHP, LPC Licensed Independent Mental Health Practitioner, Licensed Professional Counselor
Ph.D., LMHP Post-Doctoral Fellow, Licensed Mental Health Practitioner
William 'Nick' King
M.D., General Adult Psychiatry
PMHNP-BC, Psychiatric Mental Health Nurse Practitioner
Collaborative Divorce Information
Domestic Violence Resources
- acts younger than their chronological age
- fear of being apart from parent(s)
- acting out
- sadness and depression
- sleep or eating problems
- change in personality
- academic and peer problems
- irrational fears and compulsive behavior
- use the legal system to fight with each other
- put down or badmouth the other parent
- use the children as message carriers or to spy on the other parent (children feel caught in the middle)
- experience high levels of conflict and children repeatedly try to stop the fighting
- rely on the children for high levels of emotional support and major responsibilities in the home
- experience depression or anxiety
- Be gentle with yourself and know that that grief is normal, you will heal with time.
- Eat right.
- Be with family and or friends to support you.
- Talk with someone when you feel ready.
- Write down memories, journal, or write poems to express your feelings.
- Create a ritual or memorial for your loss.
- Join a support group.
Ted E. Bear HollowPhone Number: (402) 502-2773 www.tedebearhollow.org/ A center for grieving children that provides support groups and camps.
- Uses humor, hope, and empathy to build up the adult/child relationship
- Emphasizes respect and dignity for both children and adults
- Provides real limits in a loving way
- Teaches consequences and healthy decision-making
Tips for getting your child to chip in
- Make sure the chores you have your child do are safe and age-appropriate.If you would like your child to do a chore alone, make sure that is possible. For example, do not send a young child to take the trash outside by herself. If your young child cannot complete a chore by herself, you can do it together to help her learn until he is able to do it alone.
- Start young.Starting from when your child is in preschool, give him easy chores to do to get him in the habit of helping out and being responsible. For example, your 5 year-old can help clear the table, or even put away his/her clothes.
- Make your expectations clear and acknowledge hard work.Given that the purpose of chores is to help your child gain self-confidence, you want to make sure your child feels like she was successful in completing her chores. Try not to be too hard to please, or your child will be far less likely to want to help out in the future. Let your child know when the chore needs to be completed by, acknowledge that she has competed it, and let her know you appreciate her help by saying thank you. Try to avoid money as a reward for chores. Some children receive allowance each week or each month, but it is best not to make this a payment for chores done as children may begin to feel entitled to payment for any favor you ask of them, and the other values in doing chores might be lost. An occasional pizza or movie night at the end of the week or month to celebrate might be a good way to acknowledge chores being done.
- Make a family chore list.This will serve as a reminder to everyone of responsibilities, it will help your child know what is expected, and it can also be satisfying for him to ‘check off’ the chore when it has been completed. Mixing in a new and different chore once in a while can help keep your child interested in helping out. If you have more than one child, you could try rotating the chores on a regular schedule so each child is doing different chores each week. Also, try not to assign chores based on gender stereotypes. Anyone can help out with loading the dishwasher or taking out the trash.
- Balancing job and family
- Frequency of sexual relations
- Debt brought into marriage
- Husband's employment
- Expectations about household tasks
- Constant bickering
- Communication with spouse
- Problems with parents or in-laws
- Lack of time spent together
When to seek professional help for blended families/stepfamilies:Studies show that children of stepfamilies face a higher risk of emotional and behavioral problems. They also are less likely to be resilient in stressful situations. Although most parents are able to work out these difficulties within the family, they should consider counseling for their child(ren) when he/she exhibits strong feelings of being:
- alone in dealing with his losses;
- torn between two parents or two households;
- isolated by feelings of guilt and anger;
- unsure about what is right;
- very uncomfortable with any member of his original family or stepfamily.
- the child directs his anger upon a particular family member or openly resents a stepparent or parent;
- one of the parents suffers from great stress and is unable to help with the child’s increased need for attention;
- a stepparent or parent openly favors one of the children;
- discipline of a child is left to the parent rather than involving both the stepparent and parent;
- members of the family derive no pleasure from usually enjoyable activities such as learning, going to school, working, playing, or being with friends and family.
- Remember that during adolescence, communication generally decreases and a child will confide less in parents. This is a fairly normal process and parents should not overreact.
- Listen to what is being said; that is, try to understand the teenager's feelings and where she is coming from. Rather than thinking about arguments or retaliations, listen to her.
- Stop what you are doing and look at the teenager. Listen when she speaks to you. Be sure that you are giving her the proper attention and that she is not talking to a newspaper or to your back.
- Be sure most of your communication is positive, not negative. Don't dwell on mistakes, failures, misbehaviors, or something they forgot to do. Give them positive communication and talk about their successes, accomplishments, interests, and appropriate behavior.
- Talk to them about their interests (e.g., music, sports, computers, dance-team practice, cars, motorcycles). Have conversations with them when you are not trying to make a point, to teach them something, or to impress them. Talk to them just to talk and to have positive verbal interaction.
- Avoid talking too much - giving long or too-detailed explanations, repeating lectures, questioning excessively, or using other forms of communication that will result in the teenager turning a deaf ear to you.
- Try to understand the teen's feelings. You do not have to agree or disagree with him; just make him aware that you understand how he feels. Do not try to explain away his emotions. There are times when you do not have to fix things or make the youngster feel better. Understanding how he feels may be the primary comfort that is needed.
- Do not overreact to what is said. Remember, sometimes teenagers say things that are designed to get a reaction from their parents. In addition, do not say "no" too fast. Sometimes it is better to think about the request and give a response later. In other words, think before you open your mouth.
- Try to create situations in which communication can occur (driving the child to a doctor's appointment, having the teenager help you with household tasks). You have to be physically close to the teenager for communication to occur. A television in the adolescent's room can be an additional barrier to family communication. Whenever possible, the parent should try to do things with the teenager, rather than separately. Although the child may not frequently accept them, provide opportunities for him to do things with you.
- Try to avoid power struggles, confrontation, and arguing matches. Your goal should be to have the communication move toward a compromise situation, rather than a battle. When appropriate, involve the teenager in decision making and setting consequences for his or her behavior.
Q: How do I know if I need to seek counseling for my adolescent because of his or her behavior or moods?A: There is a normal amount of moodiness and oppositional behavior as teens undergo hormonal changes and strive to assert their independence. However, there are limits where an adolescent’s mental health and behavioral changes become problematic. These are some situations when an adolescent would need mental health treatment or counseling:
- If your teen is feeling suicidal or homicidal.
- If your teen has been physically aggressive at school or at home.
- If your teen has engaged in self-harm behavior (i.e. cutting on themselves).
- If they continue to disrespect adults and rules despite consequences.
- If you suspect they are abusing drugs or alcohol (see substance abuse link).
- If they commit a crime.
- If they lose interest in school and activities.
- If their depression or anxiety is causing problems in their life.
- If they are disrupting the environment in your home on a regular basis.
- If they are associating with negative peers.
Resources:www.OneToughJob.org www.parentingteens.about.com www.pediatrics.about.com www.familyeducation.com www.parent-teens.com
- Teens smelling like alcohol or smoke.
- Your child’s eyes appearing glassy, red, or the pupils being abnormally small or large.
- Grades dropping.
- Increasingly disrespectful behavior.
- Association with negative peers
- Your child not wanting you to meet their friends
- Loss of interest in school or activities
- Increased laziness
- Money (their or yours) being unaccounted for
- Your child not wanting to report their whereabouts
- The presence of drug paraphernalia
- Drastic change in eating and sleeping problems
- Depression and/or anxiety
- Neglect of responsibilities at home (chores, bills, or caring for children)
- Neglect of responsibilities at work
- Financial problems
- Tension in marital relationships
- Depression and/or anxiety
- Drastic change in eating or sleeping patterns
- Increase in amount or frequency of substance use
- Presence of drug paraphernalia
- Increased laziness
- Loss of interest in activities
- Money being unaccounted for
Resources:www.hazelden.org www.samhsa.gov www.nida.nih.gov www.nasadad.org www.alcoholanddrugabuse.com
Q: I worry about what living with a depressed person is doing to the rest of the family. Why won’t my spouse get help? Doesn’t he/she want to feel better?A: It is common for the depressed person to lose all interest in usual activities, including healthcare. It takes all their energy to just get through a normal day. It is important that family members take charge and contact a mental health professional when a loved one is experiencing...
- depression that does not lift in a reasonable amount of time
- difficulty concentrating and making decisions
- social isolation
- loss of interest in usual activities
- changes in eating and/or sleeping patterns
- frequent crying episodes
- thoughts or talk of suicide
Q: I’m dating someone who at times appears to love me so much that I feel isolated and suffocated by all the attention. He/she gets extremely jealous over ridiculous things. Should I be concerned?A: It may seem difficult to predict whether you are involved with someone who will be physically abusive. Jealousy, controlling behavior, quick involvement, unrealistic expectations, isolation, and hypersensitivity are only a few of the behaviors that have a strong potential for physical violence. If you are uncomfortable with the actions of your significant other, it may be helpful for you to contact a professional to help sort this out.
- I am afraid of my partner.
- I cannot express my ideas, thoughts, or feelings for fear of my partner’s reaction.
- My partner puts down my accomplishments and dreams.
- My partner uses intimidation and threats to get his/her way.
- My partner uses our children and pets to manipulate and punish me.
- My partner shoves, punches, kicks or strangles me.
- My partner pressures me sexually.
- My partner threatens to hurt or kill me.
- My partner makes me feel like there is “no way out” of the relationship.
Q: The police have been here several times. They say I need a protection order. I’m afraid of how my spouse will act. What should I do?A: It is hard to take such a serious step. This is to protect you, your children, and even the offender from further damage physically and/or emotionally until you can get help. If you think the situation may become threatening or dangerous, you can stay with family or friends, go to a shelter or have another adult stay with you until the situation is under control. You don’t have to do this alone.
Resources:YWCA Omaha Phone Number: (402)345-7273 Internet Address: www.ywcaomaha.org
- high levels of anxiety
- social isolation
- depression that does not lift
- difficulty thinking of anything except the infertility
- loss of interest in usual activities
- there is difficulty in communication
- making treatment decisions (i.e. medications, procedures, third party assistance)
- exploring adoption
Resources:American Society for Reproductive Medicine Phone Number(s): (205) 978-5000 Internet Address: www.asrm.org Resolve: The National Infertility Association Phone Number(s): (888) 623-0744 Internet Address: www.resolve.org InterNational Council on Infertility Information Dissemination, Inc. Phone Number(s): (703) 379-9178 Internet Address: www.inciid.org The National Women’s Health Inforamtion Center Phone Number(s): (800) 994-9662 Internet Address: www.womenshealth.gov
Q: Is it important for my child to talk about their birth family and know the whole truth about their conception?A: The adoptee needs to be able to know the truth about their birth story and feel comfortable talking to their adoptive parents. The truth may be extremely difficult, but adoptees want the truth on every level. This may be the appropriate time to bring in a professional. Remember, adoption is a life long journey and the truth will help their personal growth.
- Keep a life book accessible to the child.
- Keep your home schedule free of constant activity.
- Give your child physical touch (i.e. hug, foot rub) throughout the day
- Continue contact with former foster parents.
- Remember to not feel rejected by the child moving through grief stages.
Adoptive Families MagazinePhone Number(s): (800) 372-3300 Internet Address: www.adoptivefamiliesmagazine.com
Nebraska Adoption Agencies AssociationPhone Number(s): N/A Internet Address: www.meadowlark.creighton.edu/naaa
Tapestry BooksPhone Number(s): (877) 266-5406 Internet Address: www.tapestrybooks.com
Nebraska Department of Health and Human ServicesPhone Number(s): (402) 471-9331 Internet Address : www.hhs.state.ne.us/adoption
- Physical neglect
- Emotional neglect
- Separation or changes in primary caregiver
- Traumatic experiences
- Maternal addictions to drug or alcohol
- Maternal depression
- Frequent moves or placements
- Inexperienced mother with poor parenting skills
- Superficially engaged
- Lack of eye contact
- Poor self-esteem
- Indiscriminately affectionate with strangers
- Lack of ability to give and receive affection on parents' terms – not cuddly
- Inappropriately demanding and clingy
- Persistent nonsense questions and incessant chatter
- Poor peer relationships
- Extreme control problems—may attempt to control openly or in sneaky ways
- Difficulty learning from mistakes
- Learning problems—disabilities, delays
- Poor impulse control
- Abnormal speech patterns
- Abnormal eating patterns
- Chronic "crazy" lying
- Destructive to self, others, property
- Cruel to animals
- Preoccupied with fire, blood, and gore
Resources:Attachment Treatment & Training Institute Phone Number(s): (303) 674-4029 Internet Address: www.attachmentexperts.com Love & Logic Parenting Parenting Classes provided by Woodhaven Counseling Associates, Inc. and Jewish Family Services Internet Address: www.loveandlogic.com Association for Treatment and Training in the Attachment of Children Phone Number(s): (866) 453-8224 Internet Address: www.attach.org
- striking, exceptional fear of a person or certain places,
- an uncalled-for response from a child when the child is asked if he has been touched by someone,
- unreasonable fear of a physical exam,
- abrupt change in conduct of any sort,
- sudden awareness of genitals and sexual acts and words, and
- attempts to get other children to perform sexual acts.
- Face the issue.
- Take charge of the situation.
- Work to avoid future abuse.
- Discuss it with your pediatrician, who can provide support and counseling.
- Report abuse to your local child protection service agency and ask about crisis support help.
- See if your child's school has an abuse prevention program for teachers and children. If it doesn't, get one started.
- Talk to your child about sexual abuse. This should be an ongoing dialogue which constantly enforces the child's right to say "no" and to tell.
- Teach your child about the privacy of body parts.
- Listen when your child tries to tell you something, especially when it seems hard for her to talk about it. Don't always presume you know what your child means. Ask for more information.
- Give your child enough of your time so that the child will not seek attention from other adults.
- Know with whom your child is spending time. Be careful about letting your child spend time in out-of-the-way places with other adults or older children. Plan to visit your child's caregiver without notice.
- Tell someone in authority if you suspect that your child or someone else's child is being abused.
- 18 months - Teach your child the proper names for body parts.
- 3-5 years - Teach your child about private parts of the body and how to say no to sexual advances. Give straightforward answers about sex. Empower them about their bodies.
- 5-8 years - Discuss safety away from home and the difference between safe touch, unsafe touch, & confusing touches. Encourage your child to talk about scary experiences.
- 8-12 years - Stress personal safety. Start to discuss rules of sexual conduct that are accepted by the family.
- 13-18 years - Stress personal safety. Discuss rape, date rape, sexually transmitted diseases, and unintended pregnancy.
- Catch the child being good
- Deliberately ignore inappropriate behavior that can be tolerated
- Provide physical outlets and other alternatives
- Manipulate the surroundings
- Use closeness and touching
- Be ready to show affection
- Ease tension through humor
- Appeal directly to the child
- Explain situations
- Use physical restraint
- Encourage children to see their strengths as well as their weaknesses
- Use promises and rewards
- Say “NO!”
- Tell the child that you accept his or her angry feelings, but offer other suggestions for expressing them.
- Build a positive self-image
- Use punishment cautiously
- Model appropriate behavior
- Teach children to express themselves verbally
- Parent Education
- Behavior Modification Programs for Home and School
- Relaxation Training to Improve Emotional Control
- Cognitive Behavioral Therapy to Improve Motivation, Problem Solving Skills and Self-Esteem
- Social Skills Training